I wanted to check in today~ I am feeling so much better. I had a few sober bloggers reach out with some kind and encouraging words and it really helped me. I also had a session with my therapist last night and prior to our meeting I sent her a copy of what I wrote in my blog. For the hour we didn’t even talk about the food issues per se, it was more about me, the inner child, and the hurt I was feeling for myself. It felt good to be honest with her. I know my issues with alcohol and food are related. I have no idea what I am avoiding or searching if anything at all. I am pretty sure there is any personal drama I experienced as a child, I think I just don’t know how to self care for me. How to handle emotions and feelings and express them when I need too. I am a people pleaser, I don’t want to disappoint or hurt anyone. I want to make people happy, surprise them with little gifts or do something thoughtful. Now, I have to figure out how to do those lil things for the inner me.
How can I make things better for the inner me? I am present today and promise to stay close to my sober community. I dusted off my sober tool box and will take things slow.
Binging on food or alcohol is not going to work. My little Wolfie brain tries to trick me and think it will but it never does….
Well maybe a few special homemade cookies from a special friend helps but not a sleeve of processed Oreos……
Thanks for reading & your support!